Work Life Balance
If I lay here a bit longer, maybe it will go away.
I just don’t have the energy to tackle the day.
Sorry Son, I have to work, it’s something I can’t prevent.
Honey, do we have to go to another church event?
It feels like all I say is no.
I’m exhausted, I’m spent, I just don’t want to go.
Do you ever feel like you are stretched to your limit?
What does work/life balance mean anyway and how do you achieve it?
Before I answer that, I’m going to give you an assignment. Pay close attention to the images that pop into your mind when you hear the following word. Are you ready?
Close your eyes. Ready?… the word is Work.
What images popped into your mind? When I did this, I saw a man with a sledge hammer swinging it over his head, then I saw someone mopping a floor. What else comes to mind? A woman sitting at a desk full of papers with her head in her hands.
“Work is when you would rather be doing something else.”
Work has a lot of definitions like:
- a task to be undertaken; something a person has to do.
- The place where one is employed.
Here’s my Father’s definition of work
”Work is when you would rather be doing something else.”
If I am washing the dishes, it might feel like work for me because I would rather be doing something else, like relaxing, watching TV or reading a book.
However, sometimes reading a book can feel like work, because I would rather be out in the pool swimming with the kids, but I have a book club meeting coming up and I need to get the book read. Now my relaxing activity of reading a book has become work.
“Work is when you would rather be doing something else.”
We often call our occupation work. Isn’t that interesting? So what would you rather be doing? Life?
Work is a part of life. There is no getting around it. During your day you will have things you have to do, that you cannot avoid, but would rather be doing something else. You have to get dressed, you have to bathe, you have to eat, and you have to trade. Many of these simple things may feel like work depending on your personal mindset and what you would rather be doing. So the first factor in work life balance is work. It is unavoidable.
Next, as human beings, we have some inalienable characteristics. We walk upright, we use tools, and we have a written language. One of these characteristics is our need to rest and recover. One way we do this is to sleep. In fact, there is evidence that humans have to sleep or they may die from a variety of physical or mental effects. But sleep is not our only form of recovery. We recover lots of different ways. Watching TV, reading a book, sitting by the pool, going for a walk. We are hard wired to pursue recovery.
What if all you did was recover? How many people have you met or heard of who took early retirement only to pick up the torch again. It’s because recovery by itself is empty. Too much recovery over time is no longer recovery it becomes boredom, monotony and emptiness. After a while, if all you are doing is recovering you may find yourself wanting to do something else, but what? Work? If I’m recovering and I would rather be doing something else, that means my recovery has become work. That sounds like an oxymoron. And, if all you are doing is recovering, what are you recovering from, too much sleep?
Now we have two key factors. We have to work and we are wired to recover. So, following our definition, when I’m working, I’d rather be doing something else. The something else must be that I would rather be recovering. But too much recover becomes work. There must be another factor.
Enter the third factor to complete this complex equation of work/life balance.
I believe we are all wired different and made for a unique purpose. We were not created the same or for the same purpose. You are slightly different than me and pretty much everyone else you encounter. It is rare that you meet yourself in the world. If you truly have a unique purpose, it is imperative that you discover what that purpose is, name it and find utility for it each day. When something is used for its purpose it is fulfilling, uplifting, invigorating and energy giving.
Let’s take a look at man’s best friend. Now understand, many species of dogs were bread for specific tasks. Over time this breeding and training developed dog breeds that excelled at specific tasks like pulling, searching or retrieving. Have you ever watched a dog living its purpose, doing its thing? They are the happiest animals on the planet! Next to a Porpoise perhaps. Isn’t that interesting - Purpose and Porpoise. People can feel the same way. We have been groomed, developed and nurtured with specific skills and through generations of DNA. When we employ our unique purpose in our day, we feel excited, overjoyed, eager. Generally, we would rather be doing our purpose than anything else. Because of this, it is never work.
The Work/Life balance equation. Work is unavoidable. Recovery is required but can become work over time. Alone these are empty and will have you feeling out of balance, exhausted and having no purpose or direction. Alone, these two factors equate to simply surviving. Unless we can employ our purpose in our work and recovery. By injecting our purpose in our work and recovery we include an energy giving activity that changes work into something we would rather be doing. It changes work from an energy drain to an energy gain! Now, since work is not work and recovery is energy giving, you have an abundance and feel full. Work and recover injected with purpose equate to thriving. Your work life balance equation is are you thriving or surviving.
It is up to you to employ your purpose daily. I believe if you employ your purpose professionally, your profession will not be work. What is your purpose? How are you employing it daily? How does your purpose appear in your occupation? As business owners, leaders, employers, a spouse, a parent, a human – how are you helping to lead others to better balance in their lives though the employment of their purpose?
Would you like help discovering your purpose? Contact us at the Balanced Leadership Center to learn how.